Allahbama? Musslamics Want State Name Change

Musslamics in Alabama are creating quite a stir.

Their numbers in the state grew under Obama, who forced the state to take in thousands who had fled their homes and scammed their way into our country. They’ve settled in pockets, creating their own communities, and driving out “non-believers” through rudeness and the stench of yucky food.

Lynyrd skynyrd has reportedly already re-recorded their biggest hit and are pleased with the result. (Not true. Nothing in this article is)

Not satisfied with their unreal occupation of former neighbor loving Christian areas, they are now demanding more. Alabama Musslamoors have petitioned to rename the state “Allahbama”. They say to not do so amounts to “religious discrimination”.

A representative from the group, Mustafa Behjay explains their position:

“We are surrounded by Christian this, Christian that. We are forced to participate in your Christmas because we cannot be blind to the ridiculous red noses moose and red fatsos everywhere! But what of us? Where is the recognition for the great Mussolama people of Alabama? We demand recognition for our contributions. And the easiest way – the betterest way – is by calling this great state Allahbama for the great god. It’s only two extra letters! And it sounds the same! What’s the tall deal?”

There is, of course, significant opposition to this proposal and it’s unlikely to pass since there are only a couple of dozen Musseladins in Alabama, but the nerve of them to ask is still shocking nonetheless.